My neighbour called me a “Lady of Leisure” the other day. I know she’ll read these words because she subscribes to my email list… so I’ll try to be kind.
Lady of Leisure? Who are you kidding?
I’ve been working my buns off since I was nine years old. I got straight As at school. Why? I was competing with the boys. See, I knew this was a man’s world and if I wanted to stand a chance at beating them at their own game I had to up my own. So I did. I have an Honours Degree in Finance and was on the Dean’s List three of four years. I was even offered a scholarship to study at one of the leading business schools in Belgium.
Having been offered a job by an International Consulting Firm before I even graduated, I joined them and worked around the clock. From there, I joined an Investment Banking Firm which paid such stunning bonuses that I worked my but off for them. After ten years, I could pay off our house and still have a nice packet put away to start my own business, which I did. Because the corporate life I was living had almost made me lose everything: My marriage, my kids, my sanity. It wasn’t worth it. So I left.
Who is she to judge anyway?
When I spoke at the launch of Commonwealth Businesswomen Africa a few years back, I talked about how we as women tend to compare ourselves to everyone else’s masks. We take all the best things about everyone around us and compare them to our entire package. Then we curl up in a ball and eat a tub of salted caramel ice cream. Why? Because we believe we don’t measure up.
But what if we did? What if it was none of her business? What if we released ourselves from testing ourselves against each other and just breathed. For a moment. What if all the judging stopped and was replaced with Love. Empathy. Honouring the Other’s Journey and Making Life Work. Together. What if, whether I work or stay at home, how tall I am or how much I weigh had nothing to do with anything. What if I was a “Lady of Leisure”? For the moment anyway…